All I need – 9 –

♦◊♦

Story: All I need
Chapter: 9

♦◊♦

Damon

It turned out that I did not have to look for Katherine.
When I made it home it was almost morning – the sky lightened the closer I came to our house, but the sun hadn’t risen yet when arrived. The dark clouds had disappeared and last night’s storm and rain had cleaned the air – it was a chilly morning in autumn, though promising a bright day. The first thing I did when I came home was changing clothes – they still hadn’t dried completely and I felt somewhat filthy in them. When I walked out of my room along the gallery, still buttoning up my shirt, I suddenly saw her sitting downstairs in front of the fireplace where I usually sat. She looked up to me, smiling. “How very convenient that you’re not living with a human in here…” She said with a cool voice. With a quick movement I jumped down – and then she stood just a step away from where I landed. Her movements were fluent; she didn’t need any 19^th century robes to underline her features. She was strikingly beautiful in the modern clothes she wore – similar to the way Elena was dressing, only a lot more provoking and openly sexy. It was startling to see her. I had seen Elena so many times by now without being reminded of Katherine that it was almost disturbing to have her stand in front of me. “- No invitation was necessary to get me inside.” She then ended her sentence.
“You don’t seem to think you need any invitation at all in general.” I said sharply, but Katherine laughed softly.
“I was surprised to find nobody at home, though. After your brother’s disappointing reaction to my return I thought that maybe at least you would be awaiting me.”
“And why would I do that?” – I was not going to mention that I had waited the last 145 years – “It’s not like you ever made a move to reappear.”
She inclined her head in a fake apologetic gesture. “After your welcome on Friday I thought…”
“That wasn’t intended for you.” I interrupted her.
“No, but it was quite an impressing speech you gave there. Bad boy gone soft?” Her voice sounded icy, and she was obviously mocking me.
“Nothing I said on Friday was for you to hear, Katherine.” Now I raised my voice. “What do you want?”
Katherine sighed and looked to the floor, suddenly with an almost sad expression on her face. She closed the distance between us with two or three elegant steps and placed her hands on my upper arms, finally looking up into my eyes.
“Is this hostility really necessary, Damon?” She made her voice sound very soft and then put her arms around me. “Why can it not be like it was before between you and me?”
I felt her hand in my neck, her fingers playing with my hair, and fixed my eyes on the fire, trying to ignore the feel of her touch, but Katherine made it very hard for me to resist her.
“When you kissed me…” she whispered into my ear, her lips brushing against my skin. I stepped back.
“I didn’t kiss you, Katherine.” I emphasised, and then repeated my question: “What do you want here?”
She laughed sardonically. “Your brother asked me the same thing. You’re more alike than either you would ever admit.” Then she seemed to change her mind again, took hold of my wrists first and then let her hands glide upwards. “But you know …” her lips where on my throat again when she spoke. “I hoped you to be a little less … resentful”
I didn’t know why I didn’t do or say anything when she started kissing my throat and drew me closer to her. Without really removing her lips from my skin, she whispered: “Haven’t you missed me at all, Damon? And … even if it wasn’t meant for me … didn’t you feel anything when we kissed?”
Suddenly her hands went down my chest, and then she opened the few buttons of my shirt that I had closed earlier, but never finished buttoning up. Her hands felt cold when she let them run over skin, and she kissed me repeatedly, down from my throat, to my shoulders, along my collarbones, and a little further down.
“You’ve fed” she breathed against my skin.
“Killed.” I answered tonelessly.
Katherine raised her head and then made me look at her, her eyes steadily fixed on my face, my eyes, while her hands where everywhere.
“How good you’re looking” she smiled and alluring smile, “and so very strong.” Her lips were very close to mine, but not yet touching. Despite myself, I gave in to her; her kissing and her closeness were so hard to resist that I simply closed my eyes and let it happen. But still: when her lips finally did meet mine and she kissed me passionately, the image of Elena flashed up before my inner eye and I withdrew slightly, but Katherine held me very close to her, not letting me interrupt the kiss. Then I felt something else. She tried to get into my mind, trying to catch a glimpse of what I thought, an image of my feelings. I immediately blocked my mind from her decidedly, and then she did break the kiss. “You’re very strong with your mind.” She sounded surprised.
“I had more than enough time to practice.” I answered coldly, but she hushed me, placing her fingers on my lips. She turned my head to the side and again her lips where brushing the corner of my mouth when she spoke. “But this is so much better…”
She took off my shirt and then, with a very swift movement, she made me sit on the couch and pushed me down, leaning over me. “…So much better with you being so strong now…” she repeated in a low voice. Her hands were everywhere again; cool fingertips seeming to leave traces wherever she let them wander. “…no need to be afraid to hurt you anymore, to break your precious neck with a careless move…” When her lips followed where her hands had moved, I gave up all resistance.

♦◊♦

[Chapter 10]

♦◊♦

Read Full Post »

All I need – 8 –

♦◊♦

Story: All I need
Chapter: 8

♦◊♦

Elena

The next morning I woke up to the bright sunlight. Last night’s storm must have worn off, cleaning the air and the sky for a bright morning. I wondered why my alarm clock hadn’t woken me and looked up to see that it was almost noon. Hurriedly, I pushed my blanket aside and just the moment I wanted to get up I suddenly heard Stefan say
”No, don’t rush.”
I turned to him, seeing him stand in my door and smiling at me. “Good morning” he said gently, “how are you?”
I was too puzzled to reply for the moment and ran my hand through my hair, feeling for my neck that was somewhat tense and caused me a light headache. “A little light-headed…” I finally responded, “and tense. Weird night. Uhm … I’m going to take a shower, ok?”
Stefan gently kissed my forehead, still smiling at me softly. “Wait …” I said then. “I had a shower. Last night. Never mind. I’ll be right back, ok?”
“Sure, take your time”, he said. He sounded worried, but also a little amused.
I closed the bathroom door behind me and could only shake my head over myself. Looking into the mirror, I had to admit that I looked even worse than I felt, with the messy and tangled hair and a pale face, rather seeming as if I hadn’t slept at all last night, instead of actually having slept in.
I let cold water run over my wrists and hands and also splashed it into my face. Then I brushed my teeth and afterwards combed out my hair until it was all straight again and the knots where gone. Eventually, I eased up – keeping myself busy with little things as morning rituals usually helped. Another look into the mirror told me that I did indeed look a little livelier by now – I only needed to dress properly. So I rushed into my room, apologetically smiling at Stefan and asking him to wait another minute, picked some jeans and an auburn plain blouse as well as underwear, slid back into the bathroom and finally got dressed.
This time, when I came outside, Stefan didn’t let me rush. He held me carefully by my shoulders, softly ran his fingers over my cheek and then kissed me very gently.
“Stop rushing, please” he then said calmly. “I’m sorry, I just hate being so late…” I sighed, letting him hold me close while I rested my head against his shoulder. He kissed the top of my head repetitively and stroke over my hair or upper arms, calming me down. “Jenna let you sleep in, you’re excused from school, so don’t worry about that, ok?”
I nodded and gave another sigh. “Okay.”
His face lightened and he gave me another light kiss. “So, are you going to have breakfast with me now?”
“I guess…”
“Good, then you sit down on your bed, take your tea, and I’m going to get us something from the kitchen, alright?”
I knew it wouldn’t make any sense to contradict him now, so I agreed and allowed him to take care for me for the moment. Actually it was nice to be nursed a little.
“But first …” he said softly, worriedly, “you forget about something last night.” He held up my necklace. Automatically, I reached for my neck, even though I saw it in his hand. How could I not be wearing it? “You didn’t have it on when I came last night, you were safe with me being here, but … don’t forget about it. Ever.” He said firmly, but put it back around my around my neck with a soft smile, kissing my forehead again.
“Thank you, Stefan…” I said, still bewildered. He smiled at me, and then left me alone. I heard him swiftly walk down the stairs and sighed. No, even his gentleness and care hadn’t managed to calm me down completely, and now that I just sat here in silence, puzzled about how I could have forgetten the necklace, I remembered last night’s dreams again, but also my conversation with Damon and all the things he’d said to me – and with that also came the thought that there was something I had to keep something in mind – but I still didn’t know what it was.
“You look so troubled” Stefan said worriedly when he came back inside, carrying a tablet with our breakfast. “You were sleeping already last night when I came here, I didn’t want to wake you up. You didn’t sleep very well though, did you?”
I shook my head and took a slice of white bread before I answered. “Not really… I had such strange dreams…”
“Jenna said that you were very upset last night?”
Again I didn’t answer straight away, but only nodded slightly and pretended to be busy with the breakfast, taking a few sips of tea and eating a little. The truth was, I didn’t know what to tell him, or how. “I guess … I guess it was just a little too much last night. With Jeremy and just with everything that happened within the last days. It was like … I don’t know. Like I only understood yesterday what had happened.” I said then without looking up to him.
“Well, and …” I hesitated. I didn’t want to bring it up, because I didn’t want to upset Stefan. But he needed to know, and so I summarised: “Damon was here. At first we were only talking but then it turned into a discussion and… well. When he was gone it just … sort of all came crashing down. I tried to call you but you didn’t answer the phone, and since I was a mess when Jenna found me, she answered mine when you called back and… I guess she invited you over.”
Stefan nodded, though not only in response to my indirect question, but also because he apparently understood what had happened. “I didn’t know Damon was here”, he said with a frown – the usual frown he showed whenever Damon did something unexpected, and I sighed. I was so sure he would understand, in a way… but I didn’t feel up to telling him the details, or what our conversation had been about. It felt like what Damon had said yesterday was something that had to stay between us, and I didn’t want to give it away just yet – and certainly not as long as everything was so unclear. I hadn’t yet come to understand everything of what had happened last night, but what I did understand was that it had been extremely hard for Damon to say all these things and to open up to me like that, and I did not want to betray his confidence by giving away his feelings, not even to Stefan. It wasn’t fair – for neither of them, and I didn’t want to make things even worse than they were for all of us already. What I would have to tell him, however, was that Damon had kissed me. Twice, in fact, only that the first time it hadn’t been me, but Katherine. – And I had no idea how to explain that to him.
But of course, Stefan asked. “What did he do that upset you so much?” He sounded angry, though not with me, but with Damon. I sighed.
“We’ll get over it, ok? It was just about everything … the weekend, Jeremy … just … all kinds of things. I don’t want to discuss it, Stefan.”
He looked surprised, almost suspicious. “I don’t want to discuss it because it’ll make everybody be pissed off with each other again, and I’m so sick of everyone always fighting and competing!” I defended myself instantly, even though I felt terrible for lying to him – or, for not telling him the whole truth. “We had a discussion and I simply couldn’t cope the overall situation anymore, it wasn’t only him. Please, Stefan. There’s something so much more important than that we argued!”
He nodded, drawing me closer and kissing my head yet again. “I’m sorry”, he murmured. “You were just so lost and you’re … so sad and so upset and I don’t want him to hurt you.”
I shook my head and looked directly into Stefan’s eyes. “Actually I rather think that I hurt him, Stefan.”
He was taken aback. “You are going to tell me, are you?” He sounded very serious, and it made me feel uncomfortable. “Elena?” He searched for my eyes with his, suddenly seeming to be afraid. It was the same expression I’d seen on his face when he’d been so worried about me and Damon, when I’d told him, over and over again, that I loved him, and that nothing between me and Damon could take that away. I’d been honest, and last night’s events hadn’t changed anything about it, or made me uncertain – but suddenly I was very scared to say anything at all.
“I will tell you, Stefan. Trust me.” Now it was my turn to try and comfort him, and I kissed him, trying to make him understand that way. “I’m going to tell you everything, I promise.”
He sighed and looked at me sadly.
“You said there was something else you had to tell me first, didn’t you?” He asked then, sounding very apprehensive.
“Yes…” I nodded. There were so many other things I wanted to say right now, I wanted to explain, I somehow wanted to take away the seriousness of that matter – but I knew I couldn’t. And so I said, very shortly:
“Damon thinks that Katherine is back.”
As soon as I’d finished the sentence, the expression on Stefan’s turned absolutely blank. For a long moment, he looked to the floor and seemed deep in thought. I remember what Damon had said – that he wasn’t sure if Stefan knew, but even more, that he’d said that Stefan might have met Katherine. The thought of it made me feel so uncomfortable that I lost appetite – even more so when I remembered that, after all, I had been the one who hadn’t been entirely honest with him, so pushed away the tablet with our breakfast decidedly and then took his hands into mine.
“There’s more.” I forced myself to say, moving closer to him and leaning my head against his shoulder. I didn’t know how to say it – I was beginning to get truly scared of the outcome of this conversation. He looked into my eyes and seemed beaten.
“He said she’s been invited in.”

♦◊♦

[Chapter 9]

♦◊♦

Read Full Post »

All I need – 7 –

♦◊♦

Story: All I need
Chapter: 7

♦◊♦

Damon

I didn’t stop driving until I was out of town, and then, when I couldn’t take it anymore, brought the car to an abrupt halt somewhere in the middle of nowhere, with rain pouring down and wind thrashing leaves and small branches through the air. Despite the weather I got off the car and slammed the door shut aggressively. “DAMN IT!!!” I shouted, hitting first the upper doorframe and then the top of the car forcefully with both of my hands, leaving two dents in the metal. Then I turned around and started pacing up and down the length of the car, sometimes looking towards the sky, cursing – and ended up hitting my car again.
– I left my hands where I had brought them down and leaned in, took a deep breath and tried to pull myself together and stop trembling, but I couldn’t. I simply stood there in the pouring rain, still shaking with rage, and hurting all over.
I hated that Elena had managed to hurt me, and was enraged with myself that I’d allowed her to. The very thought of it was revolting. I hated myself for having screwed up, but hated my own reaction to it all the more. Why did I have to tell her? And why the hell had I tried to compel her when I knew I couldn’t, when I knew I’d mess up because I couldn’t get into her mind like that, couldn’t force her, couldn’t … – But why had she not worn her necklace in the first place? And why on earth had I been enough of a jackass to take advantage of that?
When I realised I didn’t see anything but blurs in front of my eyes I wiped my hands over my face, cursing again. It wasn’t only that I’m not used to emotional outbursts; I couldn’t even tell anymore what I was the most upset about. But I was so incredibly furious that I didn’t have the slightest chance to turn off the emotions – which aggravated me even more. My instincts were telling me – screaming at me that I needed to feed, though not for the sake of feeding, but in order to gain control over myself again, but that would mean I had to drive back into town, and if there was one place in the world I didn’t want to be right now, then it was Mystic Falls. Not in this state of mind.
Suddenly there were headlights flashing up in front of me, and a car drove by, getting slower and eventually coming to a halt. The driver opened the window and called over to me:
”D’you need help, sir?”  I didn’t answer, didn’t even look up… “Sir?” He called again, then I saw that he put the car into reverse and drove back to me.
“Is everything alright with you?” The man asked again, and startled when I looked up again. I had no idea what I looked like, but he got out instantly. “Man, you look wracked. You need a doctor or anything?” I denied, shaking my head. He walked up to me, and when I realised he tried to support me – he probably thought I was about to break down – I said: “You’d better leave.”
“Why?” he asked back, bewildered, and all I replied was: “Because.” – And then I attacked him. He tried to fight back at first, panicking when my teeth sank into his neck, but I held him so firm that he could barely struggle. Simultaneously, I heard somebody screech from inside the car. “ARTHUR!!!” A woman’s voice, high and hysterical.
This would end badly. Very badly. I would make it a game. I would scare her witless. I would hunt her down, and then I would kill her.
I snapped the man’s neck and dropped him, and then I looked up to the car. The woman inside panicked. I opened the door and violently drew her outside, forcing her to look at me. “Stop screaming.” I demanded, and the compulsion worked instantly. She only continued sobbing. “Now get back into the car and leave.” I pushed her away. “GO!” I yelled at her. I knew she was too scared to handle the car. Her hands trembled too much to turn the ignition key, to find the right gear. I knew that I could easily stop her, even if I would give her a headstart. – When I got her out for the car the second time, the adrenaline had probably kicked in, because she tried to fight back with all her strength. “Good”, I said grimly, “Defend yourself.” – And she did, only that she couldn’t do much against me. She knew it, and soon panicked again. I held her at her wrists. “Why so scared?” I questioned; my voice very low, almost gentle if it hadn’t been for the cruelty in it. “What’s your name?”
Her eyes were wide with panic. “W-What do you want f-from me?” she stammered instead of an answer, “Why are you doing this?” – I had to support her; she could barely stand on her feet anymore. I grew impatient and shook her. “Why!” I repeated. “What does it look like to you? What do you think I want?!”
I wasn’t even asking her anymore. I was just playing … following my cruellest instinct. Again I forced myself into her mind. It was easy now; I didn’t even need to focus very much. “Tell me your name.”
“C-Cathy.” She answered promptly, and her answer had me laugh manically.
“Cathy!” I repeated. “Not as in … short for Catherine?”
She nodded, horrified.
“Well, that is very unfortunate, Cathy.” I said, and then I ended the terror she felt, breaking her neck before I fed on her. I dropped her drained body and then carried that of her driver’s over, letting him fall beside her. I didn’t care to dispose of the bodies.
Then I walked slowly back to my car. The rain had become less and less in the meantime, but I was of course totally soaked. It didn’t matter – the clothes would dry eventually. Only when I sat inside and closed the door I was struck with realisation. The girl’s name had been Cathy… which led me to Katherine. – And, eventually, to Elena. The thought of her first gave a faint sting, but then realised that the wrath was over and that the whirl of emotions had ebbed away. I was calm.
I would have to face Elena and Stefan some time later. For now I had to see Katherine.

♦◊♦

[Chapter 8]

♦◊♦

Read Full Post »

All I need – 6 –

♦◊♦

Story: All I need
Chapter: 6

♦◊♦

Stefan

When Jenna let me in, she said me that she’d found Elena sitting on her bed and completely in tears, but that she hadn’t told her what was wrong. She led me upstairs, handling me two cups of tea, and said I could stay if I wanted – it was long past midnight anyway, and probably urgent. She also said that we had probably a lot of talking to do, and that she was downstairs if we needed anything.
Elena was asleep when I entered her room, but she looked troubled. It was easy to see that she’d cried, and she didn’t appear to sleep soundly. I leaned in to give her a light kiss on the forehead. “Everything is going to be alright”, I whispered. “Everything will be fine.”
It didn’t sound right, though. The news I would have to tell her tomorrow wouldn’t help her relaxing over anything, and I didn’t like the thought of upsetting her even more. Right now, I jut sat down beside her and kept caressing her forehead, hoping her sleep would become less troubled. It was weird that she didn’t wear her necklace. I knew that she usually did, but now it lay on her bedside table, placed there carefully. Maybe she had just taken it off for showering, I figured, and didn’t put it on again.
The day had been more than just weird – actually, everything had been weird ever since Friday night. Damon had been exceptionally gloomy and withdrawn to himself, constantly evading me, even though he’d sometimes seemed like he’d wanted to tell me something. I didn’t know him precautious – but then again, he’d just about escaped dead in the flames, and maybe the shock was only slowing wearing off. I also hadn’t expected him to take me so seriously when I told him to stay away from Elena… in fact, he’d taken it a little too serious, and had ignored her all over the weekend, which naturally upset her.
And then there was the really bad news. We’d spend all Saturday in the hospital, either by Jeremy’s side or checking on Caroline every now and then, and after I’d taken Elena home in the evening I’d gone hunting. – When I’d suddenly seen her standing in the forest, just for a second. Only that Elena didn’t look like Elena at all. She wore the same kind of clothes, but something was very different about her. I’d looked again, and she was gone. I believed myself to be hallucinating.
Today, I’d picked up Elena again to take her to the hospital. She’d been very quiet from the beginning, and had already seemed exhausted this morning. She’d asked about Damon – a question I couldn’t quite answer her, and complained about Jenna ignoring her whenever they were at home. Today, she’d not asked me to stay in the hospital with her. She’d said she was sorry, but that she needed to be alone. I’d accepted her wish – I didn’t feel comfortable myself. Like that, I’d spent the rest of the day at home, or walking around outside. Where it happened again… but today, it hadn’t been a hallucination.
“You’re not dreaming” She’d said sardonically, obviously mocking me – and then I’d known exactly who I’d seen yesterday.
“Katherine.”
“Hello, Stefan.” She’d said. “Good to see you again.” She’d come nearer to greet me. The resemblance was stunning – at the same time, it was so easy to tell her apart from Elena. The wavy hair, the scornful smile she always had on her lips. Even the way she talked. “I see that both of you made it quite far, and even together. I’m impressed.”
“It’s not been a very long time that Damon and I have been together again” I’d answered shortly. “What are you doing here?”
“I had some business to do.” Katherine had said with an evil smile. “And now that I’ve found both of you here, I thought I could extend my errand a little.”
“I don’t think I’m interested in that.”
“Of course not.” She’d laughed. “Not with your little girlfriend, Stefan. She is … impressive. I would love to meet her once.”
“Stay away from her, Katherine!” I’d growled instantly, and Katherine looked surprised.
“You have quite the temper for your … lifestyle. I advise you not to fight me.”
“I’ll do whatever it takes me to protect her from you.” – Which was ridiculous because I’d had said the same to Damon when he’d appeared. And Katherine had laughed again, throwing her hair back over her shoulder. “Don’t be silly. Your girlfriend amazes me. But be careful who you’re threatening, Stefan, you might give me ideas.”
“Then I ask you not to.”
“Be realistic, Stefan. If you’re not going to introduce me to her, then I’m sure your brother Damon will. You two haven’t changed a bit.” Her smile had been malicious. “You should watch him, by the way.” She’d added. “Make sure that he won’t steal your precious girl.”
– And then she’d disappeared again.

♦◊♦

[Chapter 7]

♦◊♦

Read Full Post »

All I need – 5 –

♦◊♦

Story: All I need
Chapter: 5

♦◊♦

Elena

I had to sit down on my bed, or else, I felt, I would collapse. I wasn’t sure what exactly had just happened, but I knew for sure that there was something I absolutely must not forget about, something I had to keep in mind … but I couldn’t think of what it could be. Then all of it sort of resolved and all different kinds of emotions seemed to fall down on me – like a feeling of shock fading out, and for the first time since Friday, I simply started crying.
It was Jenna who found me like that, sitting on my bed, completely resolved to tears, and fumbling around with my phone because I’d just called Stefan, but couldn’t reach him.
Jenna simply sat down beside me, put her arms around me and tried to comfort me, but I couldn’t even tell her what was so wrong. She told me all kinds of things – that she was sorry for having stayed away all night, and that she was even sorrier that she’d been so bitchy with me during the last days. She explained so much – talked about Jeremy and the he’d be coming home soon, and that everything would be alright, and I just listened, unable to say anything in response. When my phone rang, she answered it for me.
“Stefan? This is Jenna, on Elena’s phone.” I didn’t hear his answer, but he was probably surprised. “The last days have been a lot, she’s not really feeling well, and I guess that’s why she tried to call you. … Hold on…” she looked at me: “Want him to come over?” she whispered with a smile, and I just nodded thankfully, and relieved. “Sure.” She then said into the phone, “yes, you can do that. See you then.” She put the phone away.
“And now”, Jenna said, “You’re just going to lie down and wait for him, ok?”
I nodded again, slowly calming down. I felt weird being all tear-stained and unable to explain myself. All the time, I still had the one thought in my hand – that I mustn’t forget, that it was absolutely necessary to remember… – something. Only that I didn’t know what it was.
Jenna left me alone and told me she would open the door for Stefan – he was probably driving, since anything else would Jenna make suspicious, and the storm had gone worse so that he was probably even more delayed. In any case, I fell asleep before Stefan arrived, and was instantly lost in confusing dreams – At first there was Jeremy together with Vickie, who looked the way I had seen her for the last time: staked. But for some reason she was still walking, and joking with Jeremy. He looked happy, and then I could suddenly see that he was a Vampire, too, and Vickie turned into Anna. Suddenly Isobel said “because he’s in love with you”, and Damon and Stefan were fighting over something. Damon tried to explain something to me that I couldn’t understand even though I saw he was speaking, and again and again he urged me not to forget what he told me – which was the only thing I really understood. Then Katherine suddenly showed up out of nowhere, driving both of them away … All the time, one and the same sentence seemed to reoccur: “Don’t forget this, even if it doesn’t mean anything. Don’t forget.” – But I couldn’t remember what, no matter I hard I struggled to.

♦◊♦

[Chapter 6]

♦◊♦

Read Full Post »